Hello my dear friend xxx! (can I call you dear? by itself it
turned out. haha! I smile) It feels like we have known each other for
many years. With you, communication is for me, it's a pleasure. I hope
the same as for you. Again, I apologize for the late reply. I had
problems with the Internet and I could not answer earlier. But my
thoughts are constantly about you.
I'm already starting to get used to that I'm not alone? Sorry,
sometimes I'm acting like a schoolgirl. In general, I'm a shy and very
impressionable girl, despite my years. I do not know if it's good or
bad. Today the weather is good on the street! Only very wet and dirty
in the courtyards. I already got out of the closet shoes, which I'm
wearing in the spring. In this weather, I want to stay at home and not
go anywhere. I want warmth and hot tea. Sit in a comfortable chair,
wrapping a mug of tea with both hands. I like to drink black tea with
mint and a slice of lemon. It seems to be simple but how delicious.
You tried ? Try it! =)
It's so easy with you. I can share with you any thought. any small
change and you will appreciate it. It's so cool and nice! Do you
believe in friendship between a man and a woman? Haha! ( I'm smiling
). Just want to talk heart to heart. If you know this. I hope that I
do not seem tedious to you? with a brief hope, I still hope that our
communication will lead us to a mutual meeting. But before that, we
must be confident in each other. After all, we both know what we want.
And since we agreed to be frank, then to the end. Sometimes it's
easier to tell someone what lies on the soul. Than to conceal this in
yourself. In the past I had a relationship with a man. I did not tell
you about it. But if we agreed to trust each other, it seems to me
that we should open ourselves mutually. It seemed to me that I was in
love. My story probably is not very different from the others, but for
me it has become a point. a fatty point and a turning point. 3 years
ago, I broke up with my beloved man. (it seemed to me so). So cheap. I
took his phone, unlocked it, and saw the correspondence .. "my beloved
mine .. how are you my happiness? I so miss .. my beloved .." Then, as
in a slow-motion picture, I understand - he did not write such words
for a very long time .. who is it? he is my boyfriend, and who is she?
she is my best friend .. exactly is it ?? Yes, it's not me, not
anyone, but she !!! I remember that my heart sank into my heels, I
blew a cold sweat, my ears laid and my legs bent themselves .. I threw
a sleeper at him, shouting - WHAT? HOW DARE YOU ?? WHAT I DID TO YOU??
We are 5 years together !!! I've never cheated on you! even in
thought! I love you and have always loved you! you could not! for
what???? also with my best friend !!! it turned out he slept with her
for the last 2 years from our 5 !!! felt like a bedside rug, no one
needed and thrown into the trash ..
In the evenings I just shed tears and waited in silence! For a long
time I could not come to my senses. I was very hurt by this betrayal.
I admit, I even began to drink to somehow cope with depression. say
time heals. maybe, but not memory ... I wanted to commit suicide! But
I found strength in myself. I decided to change my life. It became
very difficult for me to trust people. That's why I want only
sincerity in our communication. People can hurt. But we need to move
on. now I have a good friend. YOU ! I hope that our communication will
lead us to a meeting. Yes, of course it's too early to talk about
full-fledged relations. If you are ready to come to Russia to visit
me, I will be only glad. I am pleased to communicate with you and I
think that we could already become friends. The rest depends on
ourselves. In life, everything happens and you never know how it will
turn. But I believe that the changes for the better. And you ? I
shared my life experience. I told very few people about this. But
since we already decided to start our communication frankly and
without cheating, I think this is correct. Sorry for this sad letter
... I just wanted to speak out and to whom, if not to you? I'll wait
for your next letter. Marina