Hi xxx.
Today I wish to tell about much to you in the letter.
I thought of you yesterday all the evening long and all night long.
For me so it was quivering to be defined with the feelings and to be defined.
But I am firm all for myself have solved and I can not constrain more it in myself.
xxx I wish to tell to you about that that I very strongly love you.
All is strong trembling and all these feelings which are stored in my heart I can name love.
Last night I have understood that ours with you dialogue becomes for me the novel.
It tightens me again and again immersing me in dreams.
xxx feeling of strong love to you causes in my heart trembling which does not give rest.
I understand that it not to stop any more.
Now I understand that you which that man I always searched.
I think that you are my destiny and we with you is not simple so together.
xxx today I have told for the first time about you to the grandmother.
I had to tell it to it because I could not hide these feelings in the heart.
For me it was very important to express as not be the strong inclination to you.
The grandmother strongly cried from that that understood that I communicate with the foreign man.
xxx it is a pity but it has a serious occasion to cry in this case.
Once I swore to the grandmother about that that more when in a life I will not communicate with the foreigner.
The darling I did not tell to you about it because very strongly was afraid.
It is difficult to me to recollect my last dialogue with the foreign man and I always tried to hide it.
xxx I tried to learn you as much as possible to understand what you the man.
I tried as it is possible to learn more close you to understand your life and your character.
After all I in a life already had to face once the foreign man.
All it has left very sad trace in my life.
xxx I now wish to tell to you about the future foreigner.
I understand that you absolutely other type of the man and you cannot so to throw the girl having fallen below nobleness.
xxx I know that you very noble man and you can be trusted.
My first acquaintance to the foreign man was about three years ago.
At that time I lived in dreams and aspired to construct the independent beautiful private life.
I dreamt of a beautiful life and passionate love as well as all many women.
In an environment of men which were near to me in my country I did not see it.
It is in many respects difficult to me to be with Russian men and I cannot understand the reasons.
Sometimes I think of that that my education of the grandmother was reflected in this fact which since early years learnt me to etiquette.
I wished to find the elegant and passionate man.
And I have found it in the Internet.
Him called Eduardo it was passionate Spanish and veins in Madrid.
xxx it was very mean man and me so it is bad to recollect that that I have gone through being near to it.
In the letters it always seemed to me that man of my dream.
The careless noble Spaniard with the personal yacht and a magnificent Country house.
He so wrote to me much and called to itself in the country.
At that time I only started to work at School and to be engaged with children.
For me then dialogue with the Spaniard was above all my life and I so strongly aspired to it.
At that time I had not so many money to have possibility to pay travel to Spain.
I had to leave school and to be engaged in private services of the logopedist.
Thus I could have more money and saved them for a meeting with the Spaniard.
Our dialogue lasted about two months because I persistently saved necessary money for travel.
The Spaniard spoke to me that I will necessarily give all money which I will spend for travel.
He spoke that could help me with necessary money but will not do it essentially.
In many respects he blamed Russian women and told about that as him once have deceived on the Internet.
I so fondly trusted it and collected all forces in many respects refusing to myself saved money.
I had to live every day one dream and passion.
My grandmother as with the big trembling concerned to mean Eduardo and admired with its Spanish temperament.
He promised even to acquaint her once with the parents.
He so promised to me much.
Our meeting in Madrid has occurred magnificently.
Spaniard Eduardo from first day amazed me with the manners and care.
He has met me on the magnificent car and in a comfortable expensive hotel room.
My month of the first life near to this mean man seemed me simply smart.
But after the first month of this luxury at it and at me money began to come to an end that all it to pay.
Together with it I have spent all money which it have given to me for my travel.
He spoke to me about time problems with its bank accounts and work on which it held an influential post.
He always spoke that I did not worry about our expenses and about that that it can compensate many times over to me all expenses.
But time of our joint life all proceeded quickly.
Its time problems became very long and did not dare.
At that moment I so strongly trusted it that spent all money.
The Spaniard promised me the future beautiful life captivating my naive love.
I addressed for the help to the grandmother and it transferred me necessary money for
this beautiful life through systems the Western Union.
The grandmother did not regret money after all all of us were confident that that all it
will return after our passionate Spaniard will solve the problems.
But in due course that did not occur and Eduardo became very malicious and quick-tempered.
It has ceased to be already in my opinion that lover the hero about what so beautifully wrote to me in the letters.
He deceived all time and installed in me naive hopes of that that all will be shortly good and it is necessary to wait only.
I again and again had to ask money from the grandmother.
The grandmother had even to ask money from my parents and to deceive them speaking to them about that that to it money is necessary for medicines.
All it could not so long to proceed and time came to an end our novel.
The Spaniard spoke to me about that that money to fly to London is necessary for it and to solve the important questions.
My grandmother cabled us the necessary sum of money of hope of that that it can necessarily return all.
xxx it was the most sad stage in my life.
Leaving Eduardo has told to me that I waited for it in hotel and in three days it can be again near to me.
I waited for it and was in full loneliness.
I fondly trusted in that that all will be already very fast well and we will live happily.
But the Spaniard has ruthlessly thrown me one.
I waited for it even two days and stored hope.
My condition then was hopeless and sad.
I remained one in another's country without money and with the big accounts for hotel.
xxx that case has broken my life and I in the first have addressed for the help to the parents.
My parents very influential people also could find the partners in business in Spain which could take away me from hotel and return home to Russia.
All it could come to an end for me is much more sad.
Since then I began to appreciate very strongly the parents and more validly them concerns.
xxx I hope for that that you can correctly understand me.
It was necessary to me once in a life very strongly to be mistaken in love and my heart it has been hopelessly broken.
But time the best doctor and in due course I could forget and live all a new life.
My parents could return me work at school and stimulus by a life.
They tried to find to me the suitable man but all it was not for me and my soul.
Parents tried to involve me during the life and to make its same monotonous.
I have in many respects changed for this time but and there was no that which wish to see me my parents.
In time bent for to foreign men was not gone in my head.
I was started up again in the Internet for love search because without love human life not the happy.
Mine search was rigid and in many men I did not see that that have found in you.
The darling I understand now that have opened to you all soul and I want that you could understand me.
xxx I love you and it not simply my dream.
I understand that you that man which will not throw me and can love me giving to me all care.
xxx now after all told to me became as that freely and sadly.
I do not know as you will concern my letter and whether I can hope your love.
Write to me please about it I beg you.
Now I understand that as strongly you are necessary to me and I try to let know to you of that I am afraid.
I am afraid to repeat an error of the life the second time.
xxx I will wait for your letter.
Yours Liliya
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